the-gentlemen-caller said: Gratzi on the follow. I'm digging what your doing here
Thank you! Your poetry is wonderful as well!
Anonymous said: Hey okay so i need some advice. A while ago my friend starting liking this guy, lets call him tom. But tom really doesn't like my friend but actually has started to like me. He is so nice, and I snap chatted him the whole weekend. He's the first guy thats actually like properly liked me, and i think i'm starting to like him too ahh! But my friend still really really likes tom! So what should I do ahhh? :(
This is definitely a conflicting place for anyone to be in. :( You love your friend, and you would never want to cause them any pain, but you also want to love and be loved by this guy who has an interest in you! It isn’t your fault that this guy has no interest in your friend. You’ve done nothing wrong by being lovely enough to have won someone’s affections! However, there are a few aspects to this situation.
I would say a good place to start is to determine how important each person is to you. Can you imagine your life without your friend? Can you imagine your life without this guy? Who would it hurt you more to lose? Either you damage the relationship you have with your friend, or you lose the possibility of a relationship with “Tom.” Is this romantic relationship worth exchanging a friendship for?
Also, I think you should determine the nature of your feelings for this guy. Do you like him simply because he’s the first guy who has shown real interest in you? Because of the attention he’s giving you? Or do you like him because of the essence of who he is, along with all his flaws, even if he didn’t like you back? Could you imagine a future with him, or is this just a fleeting feeling? Be brutally honest with yourself. That’s what I always say. Never lie to yourself about your own emotions!
One thing I do think you should do, however, is tell your friend how you’re feeling. The worst thing you can do (I know, because I’ve done it!) is to keep it a secret and let it escalate to the point where you have to lie about it. Your friend will not be happy to hear the news, of course, but I’m sure they will appreciate your honesty. Maybe this will cause them to reevaluate their feelings about him, and maybe not. Continuing this behind your friend’s back is technically betrayal. Friendship is about openness, trust, honesty, loyalty and love. If this is someone you truly cherish, they deserve to know what is happening.
I have been on both sides of this situation. I’ve been the one who has hurt a friend by becoming involved with a guy they’ve liked, and I’ve been the one who has been hurt by a friend in that same way. Speaking from my own personal experience, it was absolutely not worth it when I was the one hurting my friend. No kiss, no words of affection, no fleeting emotion was worth the pain that I caused my friend, the pain that could have been avoided if I wouldn’t have been so selfish. But those are just my personal, biased feelings based on how my individual situation worked out.
In closing, I truly hope that this works out smoothly for you. I know that even if things don’t work out with this particular guy, there is another one who will come along and love you even better!